This Week's R.I.S.E: 10 Ways To Love Yourself Better This Valentine's Day

It's true, loving yourself more does improve your life. How well can things go if you're worst enemy is yourself? How good can you feel if you're always concentrating on perceived flaws, past mistakes, and shortcomings?

This week's R.I.S.E. (recovery inspiration strength exercise) is to love yourself better. When we truly love ourselves the world responds to our positivity... and so do we. 

10 Ways To Love Yourself Better

1. Put down the mirror. Without taking your appearance into consideration, make a list of all the wonderful things that make you special.

2. Dump the negativity. We all have flaws. There is no such thing as a perfect human being. Stop negative self-talk in it's tracks and replace those thoughts with positive, loving statements. Say them aloud. Say them with meaning.

3. Help someone in need. Lend a shoulder, and ear, a hug of support, volunteer at a soup kitchen, visit with the elderly... do something that makes the life of another happier, easier, and more enjoyable. Helping others, helps ourselves.

4. Smile. The act of smiling actually makes you feel better. There's a chemical reaction that occurs when we smile which makes us feel happy, lowers our blood pressure, lowers our stress levels, and adds years to our life. Smiling at a stranger affects their day, too, so be generous and give some smiles away.

5. Be grateful. No matter what is going on in your life there is always something to be grateful for. Start giving thanks before your feet even hit the floor in the morning. Being grateful in the midst of difficult times shifts our focus and allows us to get some perspective.

6. Take a time out. Our days can get hectic. Take the time to slow down, pause, take a few deep breaths, and re-balance yourself. A few moments can make a big difference in how you feel.

7. Mix it up. Do something out of the ordinary, something different from the usual scheduled routine of your day. Leave for work early and take a different route. Walk to an appointment instead of driving or taking the bus. Meet up with a friend for lunch, a movie, or simply for coffee and catching up.

8. Change your environment. Add elements that will treat your senses and lift your spirits. Scented candles, a great painting or photograph, play your favorite music, add a jar with a collection of things that you've collected while walking on the beach... the choices are endless.

9. Get out. Don't isolate. Interact with others in person.

10. Laugh. Watch a funny movie, get together with funny friends, tell a few corny jokes. In a pinch, fake it. Even fake laughing will make you feel better. Like smiling, laughing causes a chemical reaction that benefits us in many ways.

If we really love ourselves, everything in our life works.
Louise L. Hay


Happy Valentine's Day!

©Weighing The Facts


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This Week's R.I.S.E. : Kisses In Your Pocket

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise) is Kisses In Your Pocket.

Years ago, when my now grown son was little, I gave him something to help buffer the insecurity he was feeling at the thought of the unknown ... being away from me for part of the day while he attended preschool. Each day I put on some lipstick and covered a piece of paper with kisses for him to keep in his pocket. Each time he felt he needed it, he could pull out that little slip of paper and take a kiss of encouragement. It was enough to see him through those days he felt unsure or anxious.

Years earlier my husband was in a horrible accident.  Surviving it was a miracle. The road ahead was uncertain. One night, while I was spending the night in the hospital solarium, I met a patient who couldn't sleep. We got to talking. He told me his story, and I told him my husband's. He took a necklace from around his neck, removed the old, worn medal of St. Michael and asked me to give it to my husband. He told me how it had seen him through so much and he wanted him to have it. My husband kept that medal with him at all times, switching it his wallet when he was released. It reminded him to stay strong, to hang in there, he could do this.
 
Sometimes, all we need is a little something that says to us "you can do this, you're going to be okay, this moment of struggle is going to pass."

 So this week put some kisses in your pocket. Choose something easily carried with you. Break it out whenever it's needed and draw strength from what it symbolizes. You CAN do this! 


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©Weighing The Facts

picsourcehttp://www.flickr.com/photos/taniasaiz/4546732837/in/photostream/

This Week's R.I.S.E. : Don't Hang Around Waiting For Perfection

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise) is Don't Hang Around Waiting For Perfection.

Are you waiting for perfection before you participate? Have there been events, gatherings, classes you'd like to take, a career move you'd like to make, or anything else that you've put on hold because you're waiting for the perfect time, perfect weight, perfect outfit, perfect conditions?

The problem with perfection is that it's practically unattainable and, in my opinion, boring (said with a long, drawn out, sing songy type inflection). When I think back on some of my favorite memories, it's the imperfections that made them so extraordinary, so memorable. The imperfect friends and family, and the imperfect situations led to unexpected turns of events that left me belly laughing with glee, or happily surprised by an outcome I couldn't have even imagined. Even when I wasn't thrilled by the end results, I came away from it with a life lesson that I wouldn't have learned otherwise and that I was (if not immediately, at least down the road) grateful to learn.

Putting your life on hold because you don't feel thin enough, good enough, pretty enough, worthy enough (and the list goes on and on) is one of the biggest life cheats there is.

The hard, cold fact is that we only have right now, this very moment, for certain. Everything else is a gamble and a gift. Keep hanging around waiting for perfection and you could find you've missed a huge hunk of life.

We hold ourselves back by worrying what others will think of us when, in reality, they're really not giving us much thought. Not in the sense that we worry they are. Have you ever noticed that the people who go out and meet life head on don't seem the least bit concerned with how you feel about it? They're not worried that you don't approve, or don't think they look the right way,  or think they're good enough to do whatever it is they're choosing to do. They're too busy living their lives. 

This is no dress rehearsal (paraphrasing Rose Tremain) so stop waiting and start participating.

For this week do something you've been wanting to do. Attend or host a gathering of friends you've been eager to see, go somewhere new, do something... just don't hang around waiting for perfection.

Jump in without weight, appearance, or any other self-limiting thoughts holding you back. Let go of the self-negativity and worry. Take your-self with you. The real you. The one that matters.  Enjoy! Laugh! Live it fully! And if it doesn't turn out the way you had hoped, go with the flow and make the best of it.

There's a whole lot of living to be done out there and it's waiting for your wonderfully imperfect self!

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©Weighing The Facts

picsource:http://www.flickr.com/photos/tangaroo/1280739738/

This Week's R.I.S.E. : Tidy Up Your Inner House

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise): Tidy Up Your Inner House.

We all carry around with us emotions, thoughts, and memories from our past. Some are positive, encouraging, and emotionally comforting. Some, on the other hand, only serve to feed our negativity, fears, and anxiety. 

Not all that we feel and think is rooted in reality. We may see ourselves through our past and allow thoughts that spring from that to influence our present. Things that happened to us as children are remembered from a child's point of view and so may carry a heavier weight. Maybe the scarring words of someone we looked up to whispers in our ear, making us feel less than, unsure, scared, or helpless. Maybe a past event has altered how we see ourselves and carries with it feelings of shame that, in turn, make us feel unworthy of the good we deserve. 

How do you know if your thoughts or feelings need tidying up? 

• How do they make you feel?
• Are your feelings about it outdated?
• Do they derail your positive progress? 
• Are they attached to an event that you had no control over? 
• Do they serve to help you on your new path? 

Tidying up and cleaning out isn't a simple task. Not all the negative things we feel and think are so easily gotten rid of and require a professional to guide us to understanding the whys and the why nots so we can move past them. There are, though, things we can do on our own to make a big difference in how our thoughts, and even memories, affect us. 

Start small. Stay positive. Be patient. Be repetitive.

Forgive your past self of past mistakes. You, today, are not that person. You are allowed to change. You are capable of change. You are deserving of change. 

Let go of negative narratives. Those old tapes that play in your head, telling you you're not worthy, that you can't accomplish something, that you don't deserve anything good ... toss them! Replace them with positive, encouraging ones. Start a new inner dialogue that's supportive, and forgiving.

Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be loving to yourself. 

Tidying up is a bit more involved than past R.I.S.E. but the idea isn't to tackle it all. The idea is to pick one emotional negative that's dragging you down and chip away at it until you can rid yourself of it, then move on to another and do the same.

So this week, tidy up just one small corner of your inner house. Let the old stuff go and start anew. Your inner talk is a powerful cleaning tool. Make good use of it. 

Throw out that old set of emotional baggage and make room for a more positive set. Fill the new set up with only good things. Visualize the process. 

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©Weighing The Facts
 

picsource:http://www.flickr.com/photos/mildlydiverting/9033447/in/photostream/

This Week's R.I.S.E. : Be Silly, Laugh, Have Fun!

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise): Be Silly, Laugh, Have Fun.

Laughter isn't just fun, it's good for your health and improves your quality of life!
It's free, fun, can happen just about anywhere, and it doesn't require any special equipment or membership fees. 

When we're acting silly, enjoying ourselves, and laughing we actually change physiologically. Though studies are less than abundant and results are debated by many, there's no arguing that a bit of silliness and a good dose of laughter sure can make a person feel good.

Some of the physiological benefits include:

• releases endorphins (make us feel good and help decrease pain)
• facial muscles stretch
• blood flow is increased
• breath is increased and oxygenates our tissues
• immune cells increased 
• blood sugar lowers
• better sleep
• increased energy

Some of the emotional benefits include:

• decreased stress
• reduced anxiety
• increased feelings of hope
• increased creativity

ps. faking a laugh is beneficial to our health, just like faking a smile is.  


Try these to add a little silliness, fun, and laughter to your life:

• Watch a favorite (or new to you) funny movie
• Watch a funny sitcom with a friend or loved one
• Hang out with your funny friends
• Fake it. Really. Try out different laughs, be goofy, make funny faces.
• Sign up for a joke a day email. There are several online you can sign up for
• Go to a comedy show
• Play comedy charades with friends. All categories must relate to something humorous 
• Don't forget to laugh at yourself. Find the humor in mishaps, etc. 

Here's a little something to help get you started. :)





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©Weighing The Facts


sources:http://women.webmd.com/guide/give-your-body-boost-with-laughter?page=2 
http://www.pbs.org/thisemotionallife/topic/humor/benefits-humor
picsource: http://www.flickr.com/photos/alinieri/3687736037/in/photostream/

This Week's R.I.S.E. :Self-Love Jar

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise) is to start a Self-Love Jar. 

Materials Needed:
*empty jar
*slips of paper (be creative or simply grab a piece of scrap paper)
*pen, pencil, or colored markers


Each day, grab a slip of paper and take a moment to:
*write one positive thing about yourself
*or words of encouragement 
*place it in the jar
Keep it positive. No negativity allowed.

Consider the jar your personal bank of self-love and encouragement. You make deposits into it that you later can withdraw as needed.

Feeling down, struggling, or using negative self-talk? Take a slip of paper out of the jar and read it. Take another. Dump it upside down on your bed, get comfy and read them all. Whatever you need, whenever you need it. 

 See sidebar menu for more R.I.S.E. from previous weeks.

©Weighing The Facts

 picsource:http://www.flickr.com/photos/emiliehoffpauirphotography/5516279404/in/photostream/

This Week's R.I.S.E. :Plant Seeds Of Recovery

This week's R.I.S.E. (recovery inspiration strength exercise) is to Plant Seeds Of Recovery.

Imagine yourself standing in a garden. It's bare. The soil has been turned, amended, and fertilized, waiting to be seeded. This is your recovery garden. What grows here will depend on the seeds you choose to plant in it, and the care you give it.

Each thought is like a seed and so it's important that we are careful about the seeds we allow to take root. Simply put, we reap what we sow.

Visualize yourself:

• with a handful of big, healthy, seeds. Each one labeled with a word of your choosing
• on your knees, the sun shining down, birds singing, a warm breeze
• taking your time to plant each seed carefully
• watering it lovingly
• watching it grow

Tend to your garden every day so it will thrive. Don't view it as a chore. Have fun with it. See it as relaxing, self-healing, and fruitful. Keep it positive.

 Even when we're good at staying positive, negative thoughts are bound to creep in now and again, but we don't have to water them, fertilize them, and help them grow.  Consider them a weed and start weeding!

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©Weighing The Facts


picsource:http://www.flickr.com/photos/tgerus/4662650273/in/photostream/

This Week's R.I.S.E. : Breathe and Visualize

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise) is practicing two techniques to soothe yourself to help see you through stressful times. Breathe and Visualize. These two exercises are excellent to add to your collection of recovery tools. They are simple and easy to do. You don't need any special equipment or setting, just a few minutes and a willingness to forge ahead even if you find it awkward to do at first. The more you practice, the less awkward it will feel.

Breathe
Not your usual breath in, breath out. This is deeper, more controlled. It oxygenates the body. It is very calming and beneficial both physically and emotionally.

Did you know that ...

• Our bodies are designed to release approximate 70% of it's toxins through breathing.
• Carbon dioxide that has passed through the body makes it's way to the lungs. Exhaling deeply gets rid of it.
• Stress/tension causes our bodies to constrict and our breathing to become shallow. Deep breathing relaxes our muscles and calms us.
• Deep breathing oxygenates the brain which reduces anxiety.
• Deep breathing ups the immune system.
• The lungs are strengthened by deep breathing. So is the heart.
• Neurochemicals (which cause feelings of pleasure)increase in the brain. This elevates mood and helps lessen pain.

Breathing Technique

Sit comfortably, spine straight, feet on the floor, shoulders and arms relaxed.
Keep your throat open and your lips slightly parted.
Close your eyes.
Breath in slowly, through you're nose, to a slow count of 5. Let your stomach expand with each breath, followed by your chest expanding. Once you get the feel of how long a 5 count breath is, stop counting them.
Let the breath linger for a moment before exhaling slowly through your mouth for 5 counts. Think of your breath like a wave that washes up onto the shore and lingers before receding back into the ocean.

Visualize
Visualization, simply put, is imagining. You can visualize a scenario, place, goal, and even self-healing. There are no limitations as to what you can visualize. The more you practice, the better at it you will become. We all already visualize throughout the day and may not even realize it.

Benefits of visualization include ...

• Stress relief
• Calmness
• Better mood
• Inspiration
• Improved focus
• Improved attitude

Visualization Technique

• Start with the above breathing technique.
• Choose a word that you can relate to how you want to feel, such as "relax, calm, or safe." Say this word to yourself as you exhale.
• As you begin to relax, picture yourself walking along a beautiful beach (or any other place that suits you). Take in the sounds and sights... the waves, the gulls, the wind.
• Feel the warmth of the sun and the cool breeze on your skin.
• Feel the sand under your feet.
• Notice how blue the water and the sky are.
• The tall grasses move gently with the breeze.

Make it as vivid as you can. It should be filled with the imagery of the things you find beautiful, enjoyable, and relaxing.

Do this at least once a day.

Pressed for time or at your desk at work? You can still benefit. Do some deep breathing and release your chosen word as you exhale.


You may find this post helpful: Self-Soothing Techniques

©Weighing The Facts

picsource: http://www.flickr.com/photos/paulshughes/4475998276/in/photostream/

some info compiled from the following sites:

http://www.onepowerfulword.com/2010/10/18-benefits-of-deep-breathing-and-how.html

http://www.positivethinking-toolbox.com/benefits-of-visualization.html

This Week's R.I.S.E. : Daily "Me Time"

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise) is to give yourself some "Me Time" every day.

Life is hectic. It keeps us running. As we tend to our many obligations, we often put ourselves on the back burner ... quickly slipping lower and lower on our own priority list. It doesn't take long to find ourselves overwhelmed, tired, and even disheartened.

Everyone needs to recharge. Add recovery efforts to the mix and recharging takes on yet another layer of importance. We cannot be any good to anyone (including ourselves) if we're worn out and discouraged. Taking "me time" is healthy for our spirits, minds, bodies, and our recovery. It's even beneficial for those who share our daily lives.

Where can you find the time to devote to yourself when your days are already filled to the brim?

Taking time for yourself doesn't have to be an hour long obligation (but if you've got an hour, take it!).

Me time can be as simple as taking 15 (more is better) minutes to:

• sip a cup of your favorite tea, undisturbed, feet up, relaxing. 
• read a few pages of a delicious book while waiting for your child to get out of (drama, band, sports) practice. 
• grab some headphones and listen to your favorite music or relaxation cd while walking the dog (as long as you enjoy walking the dog).

 .... you get the idea.

Do not feel guilty for giving this to yourself. It's not selfish to take care of yourself. It's necessary. Like the saying goes, it's time to put yourself at the top of your own priority list. 

So, just some simple ground rules:

• during me time you must let go of all the things your mind is juggling or worrying about.
• you cannot devote this time to a chore, task, or phone call that's waiting for your attention. 
• let it be known to those who share your home that this time is sacred and you're not to be disturbed. They'll catch on after a few times (if you have little ones, let another adult be in charge while you are taking care of you).
• Be alone during this time. It's too easy to be distracted if you're not. 
• Do this EVERY day (more than once if you can).
• Enjoy your time! 

Don't worry if it doesn't go well at first. Don't give up. You'll feel more comfortable as you go along.

You are going to be amazed at what a difference letting go of your obligations, and giving yourself a little much need attention for a few minutes, can make in how you feel and function.


Have fun with it!


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©Weighing The Facts



picsource:http://www.flickr.com/photos/meddygarnet/3392686660/in/photostream/

This Week's R.I.S.E. : Start A Gratitude Journal

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise) is to start a Gratitude Journal.

Let's focus on the good in our lives by recognizing and giving thanks for the many things we're grateful for.

1). At the end of each day, reflect on what you are grateful for.
     No matter what is going on in our lives, there is always something 
      to be grateful for. What our bodies do for us, the support we 
      receive, getting through a difficult day, recovery, being 
      alive... big or small, it all matters.

2). Choose at least one thing you are grateful for. Write it down.
       It can be one word or a more in depth entry. Whatever 
       works for you.
         If you do not have a journal, don't wait to get one. 
        Use any paper you have and keep your entries together in one place. 
    
3). Read your entry aloud. Do this a few times. Let it sink in.

4). Lastly, give thanks for what you are grateful for.


 Keeping a Gratitude Journal is an exercise in positivity. It reminds us that no matter how difficult our lives may be, there is also good in our lives, too. Your journal will be there to reread when you need a reminder or to lift your spirits.


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©Weighing The Facts

picsourcehttp://www.flickr.com/photos/hanssolo/1810380734/sizes/o/in/photostream/

This Week's R.I.S.E.: Make A Feel Good Image File

This Week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise) is to create a file of Feel Good Images.

1.) Collect images that:
*lift your spirits
*give you a warm, comforting feeling
*make you smile
*make you laugh
*inspire you
*relax you

2.) Place them in a file on your computer or a file folder at home.

3.) View them several times a day.

4.) Choose a favorite or two to carry with you.

5.) Hang one on your computer at your desk at work or at home (or make a collage).

6.) Enjoy them, absorb the good feelings your images give you.

 Choose images that do not relate to personal appearance, weight or body size.

You can find images online, magazines, your own personal photos, or doodle/draw your own

*There are many images that are available for download that are free for personal, noncommercial use. Please comply with copyright laws when collecting your images.

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©Weighing The Facts



picsourcehttp://www.flickr.com/photos/kratz/3903400295/in/photostream/

This Week's R.I.S.E. Create A Recovery Soundtrack

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise) is to create a soundtrack for recovery.

Music can have a profound affect on our outlook, our mood, and our enjoyment. So, let's take advantage of that...

1). Make a folder for your ipod, a playlist for your computer, or a CD for the car (whatever works best for you).

2). Fill it with music that lifts your spirit, makes you feel good, and that makes you smile.

3). Listen to it daily as you get ready in the morning, (while you eat your breakfast, drive to work, get the kids ready for school ...etc).

4). Listen to it again on the drive home, while doing chores, or whenever you can, whenever you need it.

5). Sing along, dance around, enjoy yourself!

* while you're at it, why not make one full of peaceful, calming music, or nature sounds, to listen to before bed?

Why not share your song list in the comments. You may inspire the music choices of someone else.

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©Weighing The Facts

picsource:http://www.flickr.com/photos/leontinemay/4875329525/

This Week's R.I.S.E.: Set The Tone Of The Day

This week's R.I.S.E. (Recovery Inspiration Strength Exercise): Set the Tone of the Day


Set your alarm clock 5 minutes earlier than usual.
  Use those extra 5 minutes to set the tone for the day by ...

 1. stretching slowly in bed (like a cat)

 2. smiling (your body and mind respond to the physical act of smiling)

 3. say at least one positive statement before leaving bed

Have a great week! 

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©Weighing The Facts


picsourcehttp://www.flickr.com/photos/dialettica/4859099011/sizes/l/in/photostream/